Perfect Princess Read online

  Gwen Stefani

  For writing the song “I’m Just a Girl,” which so plaintively points out the pitfalls of being born female in American society today, and for being such a good role model to aspiring teen rockers everywhere, and also for looking so pretty at her wedding.

  Elizabeth Taylor

  For her work on behalf of people living with AIDS—not to mention her excellent work in the film National Velvet—Elizabeth Taylor truly deserves to be an HRH.

  Buffy the Vampire Slayer

  She kills vampires. Need I say more? Okay, well, she guarded the Hellmouth in Sunnydale, CA, keeping the world from apocalypse, totally sacrificing any hope of a social life. Once she even had to kill her own boyfriend because he’d turned evil and was going to unleash hell on earth. If that is not worthy of princessdom, I don’t know what is.

  Julie Andrews

  Julie Andrews isn’t a princess, although she has played them in movies (well, okay, a queen anyway). She’s entertained us for many years with her portrayals of magical nannies, musical governesses, and cockney flower sellers. Ever gracious and good-humored, Ms. Andrews truly deserves to be addressed as Her Royal Highness. We already know she looks good in a crown.

  Lisa Simpson

  The voice of reason in the Simpson family, Lisa is the smartest second grader on the planet. Maybe she isn’t the most popular girl in her school, but she is definitely who I’d want to be trapped on a desert island with, because she’d figure out a way to get off in no time. Plus she loves animals and the environment—perfect princess material! And with her spiky hair, it already looks like she’s got a built-in tiara anyway.

  Powerpuff Girls

  The Powerpuff Girls—Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles—were made by accident in a laboratory. On the outside they look like ordinary little girls, but inside, they have special powers that give them superhuman strength and enable them to fly. They use their powers for good, not evil, and should be named honorary princesses, if anyone should.

  Lara Croft

  Um, hello, the whole bungee-cord thing. Not to mention her accent. Come on. This is prime princess stuff.

  Chelsea Clinton

  She grew up in the White House; was First Daughter throughout her formative teen years; never got arrested or made any other embarrassing social gaffes; never stopped speaking to her parents even when they might have deserved it; and hangs out with Madonna. This girl already IS a princess.

  YOU

  Because who deserves it more? I mean, you know now that all it takes to be a princess (besides a country to rule) is kindness, confidence, observation of proper hygiene, generosity with your time, and consciousness of the environment… everything, really, that makes a model human being. Because in the end, that’s all princesses really are: human beings, just like you. Only they happen to come with a crown.

  Conclusion

  A Note from

  Her Royal Highness Princess Mia

  Learning about the lives of other princesses has really helped me put things in perspective… like when I have a term paper due on the life cycle of the ice worm on the same day as I’m expected to dine with the sultan of Brunei, and my hair is looking particularly triangular and I spilled hoisin sauce on my lap, I can just be all, “Well, this isn’t really so bad, because look what Princess Aura, the daughter of Ming the Merciless, had to put up with,” and so on.

  And it all just sort of falls into place.

  Because the truth is, whatever your problems are, there is probably a princess somewhere in history or literature who has dealt with it before you, from whom you can learn valuable coping techniques. By following their examples, and incorporating random acts of princess into your daily life, you will not only be better prepared for your turn on the throne (should you ever happen to inherit one), but you will be that much closer to achieving self-actualization.

  Because though it is true we are all unique and special individuals—like snowflakes, only, you know, bigger and not frozen—there is one thing we all have in common:

  We think princesses rule.

  And by applying what princesses have taught us, so can you!

  About the Author and the Illustrator

  Meg Cabot is the author of the best-selling, critically acclaimed Princess Diaries books, the first of which was made into the wildly popular Disney movie of the same name. Her other books for teens include All-American Girl, Haunted, Nicola and the Viscount, and Victoria and the Rogue. Meg frequently engages in random acts of princess, in preparation for her eventual ascension to the throne. In the meantime, she lives in New York City with her royal consort and a one-eyed cat named Henrietta, who is a sweet, delicate flower and would never do something as unprincesslike as eat a sock.

  Chesley McLaren’s work has graced the pages and windows of such fashionable clients as Vogue, InStyle, The New York Times, Saks Fifth Avenue, and Bergdorf Goodman. She debuted as an author/illustrator with Zat Cat!, A Haute Couture Tail and illustrated You Forgot Your Skirt, Amelia Bloomer! Though she admires many princesses throughout time, it’s really their fancy dresses with enormous, swishing petticoats that make her smile. Chesley resides in Manhattan with her royal consort and Monsieur Étoile, the original Zat Cat!

  BOOKS ABOUT

  Princess Mia:

  THE PRINCESS DIARIES

  THE PRINCESS DIARIES, VOLUME II :

  PRINCESS IN THE SPOTLIGHT

  THE PRINCESS DIARIES, VOLUME III :

  PRINCESS IN LOVE

  THE PRINCESS DIARIES, VOLUME IV:

  PRINCESS IN WAITING

  THE PRINCESS DIARIES, VOLUME IV AND A HALF:

  PROJECT PRINCESS

  THE PRINCESS DIARIES, VOLUME V:

  PRINCESS IN PINK

  as well as:

  PRINCESS LESSONS:

  A PRINCESS DIARIES BOOK

  PERFECT PRINCESS:

  A PRINCESS DIARIES BOOK

  Copyright

  PERFECT PRINCESS: A Princess Diaries Book. Text copyright © 2004 by Meggin Cabot. Illustrations copyright © 2004 by HarperCollins Publishers Inc. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.

  EPub © Edition SEPTEMBER 2009 ISBN: 9780061971952

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Cabot, Meg.

  Perfect princess / Meg Cabot ; illustrated by Chesley McLaren.

  p. cm. — (Princess diaries)

  “A Princess Diaries Book.”

  Summary: Princess Mia’s friends and assistants examine the style, accomplishments, and other characteristics of real and fictional princesses, as Mia gleans from each a “random act of princess” for self-improvement.

  About the Publisher

  Australia

  HarperCollins Publishers (Australia) Pty. Ltd.

  25 Ryde Road (PO Box 321)

  Pymble, NSW 2073, Australia

  http://www.harpercollinsebooks.com.au

  Canada

  HarperCollins Canada

  2 Bloor Street East - 20th Floor

  Toronto, ON, M4W 1A8, Canada

  http://www.harpercollinsebooks.ca

  New Zealand

  HarperCollinsPublishers (New Zealand) Limited

  P.O. Box 1

  Auckland, New Zealand

  http://www.harpercollinsebooks.co.nz

  United Kingdom

  HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.

  77-85 Fulham Palace Road

  London, W6 8JB, UK

  http://www.harpercollinsebooks.co.uk

  United States

&nb
sp; HarperCollins Publishers Inc.

  10 East 53rd Street

  New York, NY 10022

  http://www.harpercollinsebooks.com

  * I am so totally glad that there’s no death penalty in Genovia. It would fully suck to be beheaded for not doing my job well. I mean, just suggesting parking meters be installed caused untold political upheaval! People can be so touchy.